The Scientist
carefully took the shards of glass out of the cupboard, dropped them in the
sink, and watched underwhelmed as the tumbler formed itself. It seemed natural,
as if it had happened a thousand times before. Yet his constantly questioning
mind wondered whether this, this first occurrence of something quite extraordinary,
marked the beginning of the end as the second law of thermodynamics was breaking
down.
As he filled the
tumbler with water he became aware that at the same time as being in his
kitchen he was also upstairs and at the other side of the universe, so clearly
Planck’s Constant had suddenly become somewhat bigger.
Later, examining the internal structure of protons, he found that they
were indeed made of cream cheese and constantly mumbled nonsensical German so
the label “quark” was actually extremely apt. Yet there was a paradox because
surely the cream cheese itself was made of atoms, and they, in turn, of protons.
And yet.
There was no
problem for Newton. Apples still fell merrily on the heads of those foolish
enough to sit under apple-trees in the autumn. The big nuclear reactor in the
sky still reacted. His home planet appeared to be carrying on its Maypole dance
around its star and keeping up its complex ceilidh with the rest of the universe.
The Scientist paused
for a moment and pondered. Perhaps the Humanities people were right after all. Every
physicist knew that all of these laws did not work all of the time. Everything
was relative anyway – Einstein had shown this. There could be a god, then. Or
maybe the Matrix was not so far-fetched. It might even be the philosophers who had
got it right – that life is but an illusion.
Scientific
advice by Doctor Martin James who identified two subatomic particles, some ten
years or so before the World Wide Web was born at CERN, thereby gobsmacking his
children’s science teachers,.